In 2020, we have already seen some great progress in terms of gender equality. Women can earn more money than men, and sleep with as many men as they like…but aren’t you tired of being treated like a real life sex toy? Do you get sick of spending loads of money on waxing, lingerie, a personal trainer and silk bedsheets? It’s time for your hubby to do the same, to look good in bed for you, dear. I’m so tired of hearing ‘It’s so gay….’ or ‘He is too lazy’. I’m sure our economy will suffer greatly if women had the nerve to ask for the same effort from our darling gentlemen.


If I were you, I would call Daniel for an emergency meeting to discuss the prospect of your sex life ASAP. Daniel needs to get hard abs, wax his ass, spray cologne and wear Versace underwear before bed. He needs to brush his teeth, get a facial, brush his hair and put on a sexy French accent. No more excuses for only women to look good in bed, it’s time to revolutionise and get rid of gender norms.


I’m sure women get irritated that they feel they need to splash on strawberry-scented breath spray and lather shimmery glitter onto their bodies, while John has pizza and beer breath and smells like a rotten dick! No more, time to get a whip and slap his tiny ass!

“I’m sure women are sick of being a sex-on-demand service.”

Ladies, it is no longer considered gay for men to take care of themselves. I have seen straight men put on makeup, so please. Plus, don’t you get freaked out by your man’s germs? I know I sound kinda weird…but I always wonder why women have such low standards when it comes to sex with a guy?


I’m sure women are sick of being a sex-on-demand service. For those who agree with this article, I hope you will go on to enjoy wonderful sex with your man after reminding you of your worth (and to remind them to look good in bed).


Raise your standards and let us be the ones to “call 38387228 for dick” after work when our boss has been asshole to us for no reason.


Love you,


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